MEME ϟ TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT

[miscreantics]

Oh Alcohol I still drink to your health!

Ladies, gentlemen, and those in between, Hermes, your patron god of cool story bro, brings you Texts From Last Night!

1. post with your character and their house etc.
2. just wait for someone, because that's way more fun.
3. TAG OTHERS!
4. SHENANIGANS.

Comments

[apreparescuer]

these are things i don't think about like it's my job
besides our bartender said i'm too pretty to suck penis

[colubri]

[There's a bit of a pause.]

sorry about that
I just choked on something

and our bartender must be dumber than I gave him credit for
there's no such thing as "too pretty to suck penis"

[apreparescuer]

i don't know whether to hope he's being facetious
or take the compliment because it's not happening

[colubri]

it's probably a dare
like he's expecting you to prove otherwise or someshit
I know his type, they're not very good at not showing their hand

btw that last text is being forwarded to Daniel

[apreparescuer]

firstly, i'm not proving anything to him.
he's pouring my drinks and getting paid for that.
you can bugger him another time.

secondly, damn you for that forwarding.

[colubri]

oh I wasn't expecting you to
though now I've got an idea
would you like to hear it

and yw :*

[apreparescuer]

i shouldn't bother with answering that
you're going to tell me anyway.

a snoggy face? really?

[colubri]

snoggy face
haaaahahahahaha

anyway how does this sound
I take the bartender from behind
oh excuse me, "bugger" him
while he pours you drinks
then everybody wins
especially the bartender

[apreparescuer]

stop collecting a harem of my favourite people
because knowing you-

nope. not going to even finish that.

[colubri]

knowing me what
what
you can't just leave me hanging like that

[apreparescuer]

i am not going to be the one to put ideas in your head.

[colubri]

come onnnnnnn
not telling me is only going to give me even worse ideas you know

[apreparescuer]

it would be completely bad form on my part.

1/2

[colubri]

oh like you haven't been indulging in *bad form* all over your parts
don't think I don't know about what you get up to once you've had a few too many, mister ooh I'm an angel look at how holy and pure I am compared to you godless lot

[colubri]

[After a moment:]

I'm sorry
that came out a little harsher than I intended
but the gist of it still stands

[apreparescuer]

no, no, i get it.
well deserved on my part, probably.

and even though you're probably pulling your guilt 101 cards on me
i just know you well enough to assume
you'd probably go find out who my favourites are
just to collect them into your sexploits.

[colubri]

well
admittedly that does sound like it would be a fun adventure
but not nearly as fun if you're expecting it

I mean half the enjoyment comes from the look of shock and/or disgust on your face when I tell you about their favorite positions
or acts
or the faces they make during
or the noises
but if you're expecting it then what's the point :(

[apreparescuer]

a pity i've thieved away your fun!
you'll just have to find another way.

[colubri]

what don't you even feel at least a little bad
:(((

:'(((

[apreparescuer]

feel guilty for spoiling some of your fun?
my lack thereof is far more redeemable.

[colubri]

well fine
I'll just have to look elsewhere for fun

[apreparescuer]

something tells me you never look that far.

you particularly won't if you're in london still.